I remember the first time I went to Costa Rica as an adult to go to surf & yoga camp. I was a beginner surfer and terribly frightened of the water. I thought I was a pretty good athlete, having been on the U.S. National Karate Team in my youth and then an avid dancer into my early 20s. Surfing KICKED MY ASS. I struggled in the white water. A wave came and crashed on me and dragged me to shore. I thought, “I’m done with this.” It had rocked everything I knew about myself. But after returning home, I continued my surfing journey. Something in me transformed. I discovered so much about myself. I had faced my fears every day paddling out into the water, and expanded my boundaries on land and in the sea. The part of my brain that regulates risk stretched in a way no other experience had stretched it before. I found myself regularly in the cold waters of Northern California. Over the years, I traveled around the world in search of more waves. These experiences, along with my travels to over 40 countries and my career as an award-winning social entrepreneur, inspired me to create a boutique surf camp experience of my own – one that brings together the power of personal coaching, self-reflection and applied neuroscience in service to helping you face your fears and discover your next life leap.
What was born was the Surf Life Retreat in Mal Pais, Costa Rica (yep – where I first attended surf camp!). Like a traditional surf camp, each morning, I designed it so that we’ll surface our strengths through yoga and surfing taught by experienced, all-female surf instructors. We’ll also reflect in individual and small group coaching sessions and together, explore topics such as life purpose and the neuroscience of our fears. We’ll also help you discover how to make greater social impact leveraging your successes to date. I’m excited that I found a small, boutique hotel tucked away in the Nicoya peninsula, surrounded by white sand beaches, breathtaking greenery and dramatic sunsets. I am so honored to be offering this retreat to share in the lessons the ocean has in store for us about life, leadership and making courageous leaps. You never know when or where you’ll get inspired in life. For me, it was in the ocean, connecting to a side of myself I did not even know had existed. I can’t wait to share this experience with others! Click here for more information on pricing and registration.
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One of the most common things I encounter when working with my clients is fear. Three of the biggest fears I encounter are:
Fear of failure Fear of success Fear of the unknown I’m here to tell you that even as a surfer who braves the cold, Northern California surf, I have certainly had to face my own set of fears, not only in the water, but on land, too. I wanted to share a story with you about this. In 2001, I was in the early stages of starting a non-profit called C.E.O. Women, an organization dedicated to helping low-income immigrant and refugee women become entrepreneurs. I was planning our first networking fundraising event to attract donors and volunteers in San Francisco. Mind you – we had no staff, no space and I was not paid at all. I remember feeling so out on a limb with this project, and having so much anxiety around this event. My biggest fear: What if nobody shows? I was mortified that I’d have put myself out there and risked looking like a failure if no one came through. It wasn’t until I had a conversation with a fellow social entrepreneur, who was also in the early stages of her venture, that I realized I had to push through my fear of failure. I was a young entrepreneur, and I had never put myself out there like this. I still remember what she said to me. She pointed out that there was really nothing to be afraid of. She suggested just doing it, and to stop thinking and fretting about it. She also made a point that I remember quite vividly, which was that if only 2 or 3 people showed up to the fundraising event, so what? It would be 2 or 3 more people who would know about the mission of the organization. She was right; I had nothing to lose. At that point, there were more benefits of doing it than not doing it. I planned the event with a volunteer event planner. I was so stressed, having absolutely no clue as to who would walk through the door. As it turned out, the event attracted a healthy crowd – between 50-75 people. It was more than I could have expected. Was I pleased I did the event? Yes. Did it help me to not be so fearful next time around? Yes. That was an example of a happy ending. But what about a situation where the ending isn’t so happy? Yep, been through that, too. I remember one of the first training workshops I put together for C.E.O. Women. I had flyered the streets of East Oakland and partnered with the school district to offer a business training program for women. Only one person showed up for that class - a woman from Tonga working on a business idea to start a dress line for plus-size women. I met with her again, and though nobody else showed up for the class, I chose to keep going. I was confident that I had something of value to offer. Through the years, C.E.O. Women had over 2,000 women walk through its doors. I could have stopped trying, left the organization and got a different job. But I kept going and ended up creating something that provided a lot of value for women, and that inspired new ways and technologies for connecting with a very hard to reach, transient population. And here’s a secret – at every step of the way as we were innovating, hardly anything went as planned. Sometimes, we were pleasantly surprised. Sometimes, we were hugely disappointed. Luckily, we had great mentors and coaches around us, who challenged us to never see things as failures, but rather as experiments with results. Oftentimes, what we felt was a big flop or failure was re-framed by our mentors as invaluable information or data with which to move forward. No matter what the outcome may be – positive or negative - my point here is that when you fear something, it is worthwhile to sit with that fear, acknowledge it, and ask yourself: - What will I gain from doing this action? - What will I lose? - What can I learn if all doesn’t go as planned? When you do something, you put energy into motion, which begets more energy. You can review the consequences and potential outcomes all you want, but if you don’t do it, you’ll never really know what to expect, or how to make changes if need be. You can write the slickest, fanciest business plan, but until you do, you won’t really know. Transition, at some deep level, is about recognizing your fears and taking a step towards them. It’s about being brave enough to face whatever type of outcome may be on the other side as well. This is true whether you are starting a business, switching a career or fumbling into new leadership. I’m curious to hear, what was something you had major fear or anxiety about in your business or career? What did you do to overcome it? Like what you read? Subscribe to my newsletter!
Do you ever feel like you are stuck with a business idea or career? Kinda like you were into it on paper or in concept, but when you got out there and actually did it, you couldn’t find energy within yourself to like it? Does it feel like you SHOULD have mojo for this, but that you don’t? Pay attention to this feeling. It means something is off, and you might have to do a little detective work to figure out what is going on.
We all want to dream of big ideas and ideal careers, but are we sure that what we are dreaming will truly make us fulfilled and happy? If you are still in your discovery phase, whether it is in your business or career, you likely haven’t quite figured out what makes you tick. You may fall in love with an idea or direction you may want to head in, but in practice, find it’s not as fulfilling as you thought it would be. Or, you may have loved the what – the idea - but not the how – actually doing it -or the other way around. Either way, you haven’t figured out what your unique recipe is for what is going to make you go out there, overzealous and energized, and speak to the world about what you do with passion. If you are feeling this, first of all, it’s OK. And if you’ve tried things and abandoned them over time, that’s OK too. With each trial and result, you come a step closer to discovering what will truly resonate with you. It’s actually an opportunity to connect and get clear with what really drives and inspires you. In my work with leaders and individuals in transition, I rarely see people figure out exactly what they are going to do the first time around. Rather, it’s a process of exploration and discovery that happens over time, and taking shape as you become more clear of your values and purpose. Here are some things I did to get to the core of my what and how on my own journey of transition, and you can do them, too. 1. Get Your Feet Wet At some point after running my non-profit for 11 years, I started to explore and wonder what it was I really wanted to do next. As a creative individual, I had this awesome idea to create conservative warm water swimwear for women. I had all of these ideas on it. I didn’t really sew, but I had designs and patterns in my head. I spoke to a pattern maker and did some research, and bought a book on sewn product manufacturing which I read front to back. I learned the ins and outs of what it would take for me to create a piece, from understanding how to choose the right material, to the importance of finding a good pattern maker. It turned out that making even one suit comprised so many technical details. By the time I got to the last chapters of the book, my head spun. It felt more like a career for a creative engineer than anything else. 2. Realize When Things Don’t Resonate and MOVE ON I loved the idea of the suits, but knew I wouldn’t enjoy even trying to make the first one. The how wasn’t something that resonated with me, though I did like the big picture aspects of design and branding, and the impact the suits would have on the water wear industry, promoting a sense of confidence, athleticism, and fashion to sporty women. I decided instead I’d run with the things that truly gave me energy in the how. If down the road the opportunity came where I could partner with someone to make the suit for me, I’d do that. But until then, the how of this idea was more of a project than I was ready for. Doing a little research and talking with people allowed me to get my feet wet first, to see if this idea was something even worth pursuing. It allowed me also to discover more about myself and what I was passionate about. 3. Get Clear on Your What and Your How In the end, I learned it was so important to be just as excited about your concept as you are about implementing the concept. And for entrepreneurs, running your business should feel akin to running off to indulge in your favorite passion. If you are in love with the what, but are not crazy about the how, you can always figure out how to outsource it, or shift your idea. If you are in love with the how, but are tired of the what, start to craft what your ideal work would look like – whether it’s the ideal dream job, a new business, or how you want your future relationship with your partner to look. At the end of the day, it’s about getting clear on the what and the how, doing the things that are true to your values, and taking out the things that don’t honor those values. In my work helping individuals and leaders with career or business transitions, I often explore key questions to help them get clear on their what and how: 1. What’s the ultimate impact you want to have? 2. What is the best way to achieve that impact? Does it resonate with you? 3. Is the how the best way to achieve that impact? 4. Where do you feel dissonance in you career or business? Is there a value you feel you are compromising if you continue to do it? So, as an exercise, ask yourself to answer these questions. See what you come up with. Are you someone who once lost your career or business mojo? What worked for you in your exploration? I’d love to hear from you in the comments section below! Like what you read? Subscribe to my newsletter!
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AuthorFarhana Huq Archives
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